The Legacy

I have just returned home from northern Utah. It wasn't a pleasure trip. It wasn't a trip to visit with my sister and her family. This was a journey for my sister-in-law Edith. This was a journey to remember her husband Dave.

Edith buried her sweetheart on Wednesday.

Dave has left behind a wonderful legacy. He left behind his sweetheart of 39 years, 7 beautiful children and 15 grandchildren.

But this is not his only legacy.

Dave loved his family and the Lord above else. He taught his children through example. He had the gift to make each grandchild think that they were his favorite. He was known by his peers as an honest man in an industry where this is not always the norm. This is how he lived.

His quiet, unassuming life affected more people than his family realized.

He will be missed. Yet his legacy has drawn us closer. Shown us the path that we need to be on.

His death brought an extended family together to mourn his passing. A family that has struggled for years because of past hurts. With each gathering the hurting becomes less. The healing can continue.

You never know when your time on this earth will end; when the Lord will call you home.

I don't want to have any regrets.

I have a phone call to make.

I have a relationship of my own to repair.

When The Answer Is No

My wish for my sister did not come true.

Tears have been shed.

At times like this they begin to flow freely again.

I know she is hurting.

She has loved this beautiful baby.

We all have.

I know that my sister would not have changed a thing.

She has given this little girl a wonderful start.

Hope.

Love.

Stability.

Belonging.

Boundaries.

Family.

This is what we all desire in life.

My sister is a hero.

My sister is my hero.

The tears will stop ........

Happy Anniversary!

I can't believe it! We were married in Mesa, AZ 23 years ago. In the years since that day on Oct 10th I have marveled at how in all this time, he still loves me. He is quite the catch (as some were quick to point out early on).

So, why would he choose me? Well why not? We make each other laugh. We understand each other's humor. We have similar interests. We compliment each other. He is strong where I am weak and I am strong where he is weak. We love each other. He is HOT! He has an AWESOME smile. Ok, I tease about the smile! But that's what we do, we tease! We joke, we try not to take things too seriously, because frankly our life has been far too serious at times. We have made sacrifices for our boys. And with these trials and sacrifices our love for each other has grown stronger and deeper.

I married my best friend. It doesn't get any better than that!

MY BEST FRIEND

My hubby is my best friend. That's why I married him.

He answered all of my premarital questions correctly.

I had a long list of them too! It wouldn't be easy but he passed with flying colors. Some of the questions were......

Will you change diapers? Check
Will you love me if I gain weight? Check
Will you get up with the kids in the night? Check
Will you do dishes? Check
Will you do laundry? Check
Will you love me forever? Check


Seriously, they were some qualifying questions that I had. I had my fair share of dating guys who said they would NEVER touch a diaper. GOOD-BYE.

Some said that dishes were women's work. SEE YA.

Then after a stormy relationship I met Drew. He was calm, quiet, sincere. He served others. He loved God. He honored his parents. He adored his mother. He had a good sense of humor.

He was exactly what I was looking for.

I have been blessed to have him in my life. He is my support. He is my rock. He is my love. He improves my surroundings just by being there.

Happy Father's Day to the father of my boys.

I LOVE YOU!

My Lost Key

I found my key the other day. I didn't know it was lost. It isn't a key to any tangible door. I had an "AHA" moment, and then, right before me was the key.

My key.

A key that I had begged for. Cried for. Longed for. Hoped for. Prayed for. There it was, right in front of me.

I have been searching for control in my life. Control over my life. Control of my life. The more things I tried to control the less control I seemed to have. That was THE KEY. I was trying to control THINGS, while still allowing OTHERS to have control over me.

I have found my key. CHOICE.

I choose to take my life back. I choose to be responsible for my life. That means I hold no one else responsible for what happens to me.

I CHOOSE ME.

For those of you who know me, or of my circumstance, THIS IS BIG.

I have allowed others to have too much control over my life. I allow what others think of me to dictate what I will say, how I will act or who I will be.

I am good enough as I am.

I am worthy of love as I am, just because I AM.
I choose to be happy instead of indifferent.
I choose to love not just be loved.
I choose peace instead of anger.
I choose my husband and sons.
I choose joy.

By choosing my own destiny I am taking back my life. The life I have been searching for all these years.

I thank God for small miracles and ask for one more.

(I went to the doctor this week and received some not so great news. I will know more in July. You may get to see me glow again.)

AND IN THE END......

He's home safe and sound. It was a great experience to meet him at the little airport we have here in our little town. The coziness of the airport makes it that much more of an intimate experience for the missionary returning along with his family and friends.

He served honorably and well. He has stories that would make you squirm. His white shirt was not so white. Grey as a matter of fact. But, he was home. Safe and sound.

My boy is home.

He is entering a new phase of his life. I am excited for what the future holds for him. I hopeful in these trying and uncertain times. That's what faith can do for you. That's the brightness that a newly returned missionary brings home with him. I highly recommend it!